When a person dies it is customary in the United States to hold a Memorial or Funeral Service.  These services have the dual purpose of:

• Honoring the life of the person who has died.
• Giving those who survive the deceased an opportunity to have a formal moment of closure.

Sometimes people request that no service of any type be held after their death.  When I ask people why they feel this way, the two most common responses are:

• I don’t want my body on display after I die.
• A service is just too much effort for others; I was to exit earth without a lot of activity.

I believe in honoring the wishes of the deceased as funeral or memorial services are planned.  That is why I think it is crucially important to have these discussions with those we love before they die.  If they are of the opinion a service would be a burden for those who survive them, the survivors have the opportunity to share why they want to have a service and why it will benefit them.

I recently had a patient die that I had grown quite close to during our chaplain – patient relationship.  We had discussed many things about events in her life that were important to her.  We had discussed salvation and how much she loved God, even though she made mistakes in her life.  I assured here that there has never been a person die that has not made mistakes.  Our mistakes are not barriers from God due to God’s grace and willingness to forgive.

Since this patient has chosen not to have a service either funeral or memorial, I find myself without a formal way to bid a farewell to her.  So I am writing this blog to express my sense of loss and also offer a positive reason for why funerals and memorial services are important.  I hope this article helps at least one person as they plan for their exit from earth and entry to the Heavenly Kingdom!